a. To enjoy the social aspect of Kim’s Group you will need to be on Facebook. Most of our social correspondence is on Facebook secret pages, and your privacy will be protected as best as we can. Facebook Secret pages just means a group where we can talk to each other but your other friends and family won’t see those posts.
Please Note: We have chosen Facebook as a platform rather than hosting a forum for a number of important reasons including keeping our membership fees down. If you are not on Facebook we are happy to help you get started but we don’t have time to engage in discussions of how or why FB is bad.
b. You need to be committed to working on new skills in communication and leadership. Kim’s Group is not a place you will find sympathy if you are not looking to work on improving yourself.
c. You need to respect Kim’s Group is a place to learn the skills Kim and Steve teach. While other people’s experience and advice are welcome, participants need to stay on topic and not use the group to promote different approaches or ideas.
d. You need to accept that we view divorce as a highly private and personal choice that should NEVER be suggested as a means of protecting a family from violence or abuse. Statistics and experience bear us out. In cases of aggression we advocate 100% no tolerance and don’t suggest victims hand responsibility for their safety or protection to anyone (including courts, police, government authorities etc.) lightly. Trust is something that should be earned not given and members need to take 100% responsibility for their own safety.
Divorce is not a decision for a person to make when they are upset and will usually only make the conflict worse. To be an active member of the social aspects of this class you need to respect that our team never view divorce or ‘no contact’ as simple solutions to conflict on their own.
Because of this it is against the rules of this community to suggest divorce or separation to other members as a means of punishment/revenge or as a means of implementing no tolerance. Implementing 100% no tolerance in a way that de escalates conflict is not one size fits all.
e. You must agree not to come on the social pages of Kim’s Group when you are under the influence of alcohol or drugs or you are emotional or upset. Self soothing is a major component of this work and requires members overcome the urge to turn to each other when they are upset. You may come asking for ideas of how to self soothe but please keep it short and to the point.
f. You must agree to be respectful with other members of the group. This includes understanding that group members have differing religious and political beliefs and therefore it is best to keep your own beliefs out of group discussions. People of all beliefs are welcome in the group but members quoting religious texts or espousing religious or political stand points will be highly discouraged.
g. The comment features of Kim’s Group are to ask questions and learn – so members should be mindful not to overwhelm other participants looking for individual help and advice.
Kim’s Group subscription does NOT replace working through the programs included and purchasing and reading Kim’s books. The books (especially the Love Safety Net Workbook) will give you the basics steps you need to end conflict and have an understanding of the principles her advice is based upon.
If you are experiencing abuse in your marriage you can sign up for her free intro tutorial class for dealing with this here: The NC Marriage Free tutorial