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Continued from: Accessing Your Most Positive Brain States

Welcome to Part 2 of the introduction to
Inner Connections  – Wisdom for Life Decisions – a 5 part short program. 

This program is about you learning to connect with your inner wisdom to make better decisions for yourself.

(To read more about my philosophy behind this program, please click the link through to Part 1 here: Accessing Your Most Positive Brain States.)

The guidance in this program will connect you with inner peace as a state of being in the world.  Not only is this a beautiful way to experience the world but it is also your best and surprisingly your most practical pathway to good decision-making.

Inner Connections – Wisdom for Decision Making 

The program will guide you chapter by chapter through a process of learning to access the 5 inner states that connect you to the wisdom you need, to direct your life through decisions both large and small.

The 5 inner states we will cover in this program are: 

Inner Connections 1. Reflection
Inner Connections 2. Meditation
Inner Connections 3. Empathy
Inner Connections 4. Prayer
Inner Connections 5. Logic

I suggest you use this process: 

  1. When you find yourself uneasy about a situation in your life. 
  2. Whenever you make important choices. 
  3. When you are doing any planning. 

This process will require you setting aside some time on your own, but once you learn how to access these states you will never be left at a loss as to how to occupy yourself when you are left waiting somewhere or alone with nothing to do for a while.    


I start with reflection because this is the easiest way to move yourself out of guessing how the things you are planning will make you feel (which humans have been proven to be very bad at) and into a healthier inner landscape. How did the same situation you are facing right now (or similar) work out for you in the past? Can you be honest in reviewing possible dangers and how you might have done better?


Once you have spent some time in reflection it is now time to slow down your thinking and breathing and check in on what your heart and gut is telling you. 

Once you have tuned into that message and taken note of anything your body is uneasy about now it is time to calm your heart, slow your breathing and stop thinking at all for a little while. 

Be still and simply part of your environment, taking in all that is happening around you without trying to control it. 


At peace with yourself and at peace with God, now you are ready to move yourself into a state of empathy. 

How will your plans affect the people around you? Will the resources you need for your current plans all be obtained fairly? 

What might help you to be more in tune with the world around you? 


This is the deepest inner state and most challenging to access. It requires you moving away from the drive of your ego’s agenda (which reflection will help you do), stilling yourself mind and body (meditation) to become ready to open yourself to a higher perspective on your life. 


After completing the inner journey above, the logical details of what is your ‘best next step’ should come fairly easily. 

Once you are in tune with yourself (Reflection and Meditation), in tune with God (Prayer), and in tune with those around you (Empathy), your plans should flow more smoothly and what you need come to you more easily. 

A 5 step process for decision making may sound complex and time consuming but if you are tired of your life going round in circles and you want to connect with more certainty, this process is here to help.

Ready to get started?
Connecting with your inner wisdom for better decision making.
Read More About this eCourse . . .

Kim Cooper

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Kim is the author of seven books on the topic of relationships and emotional intelligence.

A prolific multi-media content innovator, Kim has created and shared a library of articles and multi-media educational tools including radio shows,
movies and poetry on 'The NC Marriage', and 'The Love Safety Net'.

This Post Has 3 Comments
  1. Perhaps reflecting and not trying to predict will help stop the mental ruminations (the fear that I am making a huge mistake by staying in my marriage, and trying to “reason out” what are the right steps.) This treadmill gets triggered in my head many times when my husband does something egregiously hurtful and in that mind-set I can’t remember his strengths and am both too reactive to respond with appropriate limits or to empathize with his weaknesses.

    When my mind is not engaged around the conflict and those questions, I am much better off, but within the conflict, it is difficult not to keep struggling to get what I think will make me “happy.” (emotional reassurance from someone who honestly can’t give it at that moment, and nothing I do will change / control that – at least not in a positive direction.)

    Intellectually, I understand … hopefully this new perspective helps me in applying it in the most challenging circumstances.

    Great to re-view Dan Gilbert within this context.

    1. Hey MFRS – Thanks for offering your inner perspective – it is always welcome here 🙂 I really hope that you might set some time aside to try the inner process offered here.

      I admit I’m obsessive and used to spend my life writing “letters” in my head to people in my family I thought I owed something to (or I was upset with). I can’t tell you how happy I am that this habit of mind is now something of the past.

      Being an introvert at heart, I spent years studying biblical and ancient history. I also spent years learning to still my mind and breath. But alas, to my intense disappointment in terms of ‘enlightenment’ I always reached a dead end.

      Once I put all the practices together and arrived at this process I am offering now – I despaired that no matter how refreshing, simple and liberating I found these steps, teaching people the process would be so complex that it would be impossible to share.

      When sharing however, I found the opposite to be true.

      This is because the steps flow into each other so naturally.

      For instance reviewing your past performance is difficult if after that there is no place in your mind to go.

      In this process however, as you head to the ultimate perspective of judgement on your life, you are also
      heading to the ultimate ideal in yourself in terms of self love.

      Please help me test this! I think you will be surprised if you give the process a try!

  2. Trying to ….

    Trying to not keep writing monolgues to figure out what is the right thing to do. I want to “take action”, to help resolve this dissonance in our lives, but I no longer have someone who even will try.

    Trying accept that at this particular moment I have a giant spoiled rotten baby, who thinks he can do and say whatever he wants and everyone should be thrilled with him, and whatever doesn’t resonate with that must be my fault.

    Trying not to want to connect with the person who I thought was actually underneath of that and was tired of having to keep up a “marketing show,” not sure if that person is real or my own fantasy.

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